Tens of thousands of witches around the world join forces every month to cast a 'binding' spell on Donald Trump and 'protect' us from his actions
TENS of thousands of witches around the world join forces every month to cast a binding spell on Donald Trump, Hollywood witch Vicky Adams has revealed.
Vicky, who runs a renowned occult store in tinseltown, says the spell aims to stop the US President from reaping harm and destruction across the globe.
Here's a question is reaping self-proclaimed witch Vicky Adams's word or self-proclaimed author Emma Parry's word? Either way, why didn't five layers of editors catch the mistake?
Anyway, that's a tangent. The real point is, thousands of witches have been casting their spells since Trump took office, and now we've had more hurricane damage than in the past several years combined. Nice job, retards.
Clinton's score-settling frustrates Democrats
In sum, Hillary Bitch Clinton's What Happened finds fault with the entire world. Crooked Hillary apparently never looked in the mirror when trying to figure out whom to blame, but I can't really fault the hag for avoiding mirrors.
Husband catches wife cheating via phone app and now faces charges of 'unlawful surveillance'
A man was looking for his son's misplaced phone and found it in his former boss's bedroom, along with his naked wife and his naked former boss. Now he's facing burglary and surveillance charges.
And, continuing the good news about phones and other devices,
A Simple Design Flaw Makes It Astoundingly Easy To Hack Siri And Alexa
Ultrasonic commands for the win, yo. Just because you can't hear it doesn't mean your device can't.
A couple months ago I mocked some studio execs whining about bad reviews hurting their profits. And how Rotten Tomatoes just wasn't fair.
Attacked by Rotten Tomatoes
Studio executives' complaints about Rotten Tomatoes include the way its Tomatometer hacks off critical nuance, the site's seemingly loose definition of who qualifies as a critic and the spread of Tomatometer scores across the web.
All together now: Waaaaaaaah!
What I didn't see in the article essay was any discussion of how Hollywood is deliberately cutting their products' appeal to American audiences in order to chase the international market. Which is fine for them if it works but at this point it seems not to be.
Neither did the essay mention that movie directors, actors, and screenwriters seem to be doing their damnedest to piss off half of the American public - the half which won the 2016 elections, I'll point out - with their around-the-twist liberal slant and their inability to SHUT UP when their words might get to normal people. Which, again, would be fine for them if it didn't hurt their bottom line, but it is. Too bad, so sad, lie in the bed your lies made.
Finally, saving the best for last,
Swiss scientists say they've invented a new type of chocolate - the first one after 80 years
There's some doubt about whether it's real and not just marketing nonsense but, as the article's author says, I want to believe.